Courtesy of David Sedaris, One Time Maverick

I was going to write a blog about undecided voters, but David Sedaris beat me to it (Ugh. He's always doing that.) Anyway, David contributed this little piece to the New Yorker's Shouts and Murmurs section.

It's a must read.

Here are some blurbs...

To put them in perspective, I think of being on an airplane. The flight attendant comes down the aisle with her food cart and, eventually, parks it beside my seat. “Can I interest you in the chicken?” she asks. “Or would you prefer the platter of shit with bits of broken glass in it?”

To be undecided in this election is to pause for a moment and then ask how the chicken is cooked.

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Most of my friends were going for Carter, but, as an art major, I identified myself as a maverick. “That means an original,” I told my roommate. “Someone who lets the chips fall where they may.” Because I made my own rules and didn’t give a damn what anyone else thought of them, I decided to write in the name of Jerry Brown, who, it was rumored, liked to smoke pot. This was an issue very close to my heart—too close, obviously, as it amounted to a complete waste. Still, though, it taught me a valuable lesson: calling yourself a maverick is a sure sign that you’re not one.



Hilarious and true.

Commercials That Confuse Me

A downside of living in my own place and having all of a 30 second commute??

Television.

When I still lived at home and was commuting, I hadn't a care in the world for TV...but now that I'm living alone with more time and a TV staring me in the face, I've succumb to the dirty, rotten world of the boob tube.

Anyway, in my new television trance state, I've found a few confusing commercials...

Check out this one for Luv's diapers. What part of little baby animated hippies going to a music festival would make a person want to buy diapers? And why should little babies be spending time at music festivals? I'm confused.

I'd love to be in the room when they pitch these commerical ideas- "Okay! I got this idea! You want to sell diapers? I know what'll sell diapers...toddlers at a music festival, rockin' out to the sounds of Get Together by The Youngbloods!!!" If I were a mother, the thought of my baby at an outdoor music fest would only make me irritated. That is a very sticky situation.

The second is for Nuva Ring. Now, clearly the people working at Nuva Ring are on drugs (under the influence of TOO much Nuva Ring, perhaps??). Synchronized swimmers in matching outfits in a pool? I get it- they represent the pills in the circular thing...I think. And that song? THAT SONG HAUNTS ME! It's creepy and strange, but it does make more sense than the baby hippies.


I need to start reading again.

That One is My President :)

Getting All Maverick-y

I read the ten page article, Make Believe Maverick in Rolling Stone yesterday and gee whiz! I'm sure glad I did, don't ya know!

(Rather than watching mindless TV, plop down and read it.)

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It's crunch time and this is getting exciting. I caught a clip of Elizabeth Hassleback on The View today squawking about Obama's connection to Bill Ayers and the table also brought up McCain's involvement in the Keating Five. Barbara Walters was right to point out that slander isn't the way to campaign and we should all be focusing on the issues. She's right...BUT! Hassleback didn't Hassleback down! She insisted that this means Obama is palling around with terrorists.

Let's consider this...

Barack Obama once attended a party at Bill Ayers' home in his honor. That's what we know. John McCain, on the other hand, was involved in a huge political scandal that was directly related to the savings and loans crisis in the late 80's. Yes, I'm disgustingly liberal and so of course I'm not completely terrified by the Obama/Ayers connection. But in general, if we are going to actually go back in time and point fingers, shouldn't we be more concerned about an actual accusation- an involved, serious, jeopardizing case that was directly tied to a financial crisis, as opposed to a one time canoodle with someone who was radical FORTY years ago?

Just sayin'.

Queen of the Road

Ladies and germs, I would like to introduce you to my new bike!

It's actually a used bike, but it's new to me! I picked it up at Nearly New Bikes on Broadway and Sheridan. They take and old frame and totally update the bike, so it's...you guessed it, nearly new! It's super lightweight, which has taken some getting used to, but I love it.

I am soaking up the last few weeks/months of ride-able weather and enjoying being soooo close to the lakefront path. It's such a luxury to live so close to the lake and I'm trying to take advantage of it best I can!

My car is on the way out, so it's bike and public transit from this point on. Green transit all the way, baby!



I'm thinking of calling her my Black Beauty...

CuTeSt CoUpLE aWaRd

Aren't they precious?

John and Cindy have nothing on them. Even if I were a (gasp!) republican, I think I'd have to admit these two seem to keep the love alive.

I just took some time out of my day to go through The Obama's Greatest PDA Moments on the Huffington Post. Dork? Yes. Worth it? Totally.

Enjoy :)

Post Turtle

I rarely get, let alone read email jokes, but this one was cute...

While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75-year old Texas rancher whose hand was caught in a gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. Eventually the topic got around to Sarah Palin and her bid to be a heartbeat away from being President. The old rancher said, 'Well, ya know, Palin is a post turtle.' Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a post turtle was. The old rancher said, 'When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle.' The old rancher saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain. 'You know she didn't get up there by herself, she doesn't belong up there, she doesn't know what to do while she is up there, and you just wonder what kind of dumb ass put her up there to begin with.'